Dwayne – 11/11/99
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No one is safe. Everyone in the world is at risk. IF you have loved ones,
relatives who care, friends, anyone whomsoever that might send you flowers,
then you are a target!
A target from whom? Perhaps it’s your local florist. IF it is, there’s a
very good chance they are connected to a powerful worldwide ring of terrorists masquerading as florists. It’s no coincidence that the words
terrorist and florist both end in ‘rist’ (Greek for creator) and we are
left staring at this correlation – the creator of the flo of terror! That
may seem obscure to you, but even their acronym ‘IF’ is a careful and intentional choice.
IF is one of the most used words in the English language. We all say it,
yet we have no idea how much more power we give it just by saying it. “What
IF?” “IF only!”,”you can IF…”, “Not IF…”, and the IF goes on. IF is
something we can do nothing about. IF leaves us helpless!
The massive alliance is known as IF. IF is in our homes, our communities,
our politics, and we unwittingly teach it to our children. IF exists almost
invisibly. And because of IF, no one is safe. Not even children.
And that just scratches the surface as to the depth to which IF has infiltrated our humble lives. To remind you, IF is all about florists –
International Florists!
What IF part of their clever tactics to remain undetected is the prolific
expansion of niche flower sales? It may seem perfectly normal, but look
around. The sale of flowers has seeped out of traditional flower shops and
invaded our dairies and flooded our gas stations. They’re falling out of
the back of vans and spilling out onto our sidewalks. Flowers are everywhere! It’s a multi-billion dollar industry and it’s controlled by
IF.
The conspiracy is to make us see that buying flowers is an easy thing to do
– the right thing to do. The propensity to give flowers is driven by multi-million dollar advertising campaigns. Remember the ad- “Say it with
flowers”? And do you recall some years back a song entitled, “You Don’t
Bring Me Flowers, Anymore’?” Not many know this, but that song was commissioned by IF.
It was written to tug at the heartstrings of the guilty. And just as organised religion has based its power for two millennia on guilt, so too
is the nemesis of floral conscription. We are all hopelessly guilty and we
hang ourselves on the path of least resistance. Flowers have become our
crucifix.
Flowers are like fast food – a quick fix. There is always a birthday or
anniversary. There are always house warming parties and dinner parties.
Valentine’s Day and Daffodil Day – add these to the highway of shame. And
somewhere close by there is always a bouquet of flowers sitting in a bucket
of water waiting to quell your embarrassed conscience.
How did this all start?
Let’s touch briefly on the history of the humble flower. The flower as a
symbol of peace can be traced back to early biblical times with the dove
and the olive twig (metaphor for flower). Suddenly the flower takes on the
strength to represent countries – the thistle for Scotland, the rose for
England. A blooming flower represents a change of season- the birth of spring. A flower represents growth, hope and prosperity. Flowers are quicker than lawyers! Flowers are there before an autopsy, a settlement, a
hearing or the reading of a will! Flowers are instant! Who else stands to
gain the most (besides heirs) from anyone’s death? The florists!
Flowers are an international symbol of our sorrow, sympathy, grief, and
grace. When you ‘Say it with flowers’ it’s worth a lot of money to the floral conspirators. And for the encore? Tada! No one can escape death.
Florists win by default- an endless supply of business.
Yet, it seems that in the current climate of international greed, waiting
for death is not fast enough. What if untimely deaths of world famous people were being orchestrated? There’s no actual proof, as with any global
conspiracy, but the evidence is evident. Think about it.
Natural death is one thing, but a ‘sudden death’ is quite another. The fact
remains. A sudden death has more flower power than a natural death.
It’s sad to think about it, but Lady Di is the perfect example. Recall the
way the media portrayed the crash site and the eternal shrine of flowers.
It was heart wrenching. So many people affected. Millions mourning behind
the great walls of flowers. What propelled this wave of sympathy? Global
prime time TV coverage sending the subliminal message to the world – ‘Buy
flowers!’
Does anyone know how many millions of dollars were spent on flowers as a
result of Lady Di’s untimely death? If you do, I’d like to know.
Regardless, it would be safe to assume that flowers are worth billions.
Billions of dollars a year. What IF they are allied with global media and
insurance companies? What kind of power does this give them? What does it
make IF? Untouchable.
Why does the president have so many bodyguards and so much security? They’re afraid of florists. All the world powers know how big IF really is.
Watch the news. Notice how busy and paranoid the security men get when a
little girl gives flowers to the president, or the Queen, or a Prime Minister. The dark sunglasses. Talking into their wrists. They are frantically looking for florists. This is really quite silly, because the
florists are never at the scene. They have already done their work. The
flowers are already in the little girl’s hand!
In interviews with people with high public profiles, we asked what they
feared the most. And above snipers, stalkers and car salesmen, their number
one fear is flowers. One psychologist suggests that it’s a frightening association of flowers with premature death.
Here’s something you need to know. When do we buy flowers? The top three reasons people buy flowers is: A) death, funeral, memorials B) Illness C) To patch up arguments… which lead to death if left un-patched. It’s a
vicious circle.
We’re just seeing the beginning of this sinister affair. There are florists that don’t even know they are part of this global atrocity. They
just go on their daily business of providing beautiful floral arrangements
to their customers, oblivious that there is something more ominous and evil
lurking around every order they take.
If you are famous with celebrity status, you are a higher IF risk group.
Insurance companies know this – have a look at the kind of premiums these
people pay! Unfortunately, even Joe Blog and Jane Doe are on the endangered list.
For as sure as a flower grows you are represented as a dollar figure in someone’s cash register. The next time you walk by a florist’s shop, notice how they look at you. Ask yourself, are they a participant in the
Floral (Unconfirmed) Conspiracy Theory? Don’t make me spell it out for you.
What lurks behind their scented smile? Be afraid. Be very afraid!
If you have had some disturbing experiences with flowers or florists and
you’d like to share them, please add your comments to Back Chat. We have to
face our concerns and let IF know we’re on to them!
